or click here"I'm in a totally zen-like state… Can't you tell how fucking zen I am?!"
or click here"Shoot the wig! Shoot it! Don't let it get up again. Oh, that's the third rabid toupee we've had this week. Something wrong. Very wrong."
or click here
Don't you mean "rabid" toupee?
ReplyDeleteAlthough, I've seen a few hairpieces that could have passed for rabbits...
Heh heh, 'hare'piece.
"Before you begin, I just want to make it clear that I don't have the energy for a fake conversation."
ReplyDeleteThat should be put on T-shirts :) hehehehe
Rayjay - Ah, yes, that does make much more sense. I changed it. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteCould the last one be a reference to the Simpsons episode 'Treehouse of Horror IX'? In one story, 'Hell Toupee', the culmination comes as the police shoot a living wig that is trying to escape.
ReplyDeleteOf all of STM's quotes so far, I think the one I'd most like to have on a t-shirt is "I'm in a totally zen-like state… Can't you tell how fucking zen I am?!"
ReplyDeleteFollowed as a close second by the fake conversation one. Two gems today!
Rabid toupees, huh? That would explain many things! Including that thing on Donald Trump',s head that looks like it climbed up there and died!
ReplyDeleteYes, something is wrong! So very, very wrong!
"Before you begin, I just want to make it clear that I don't have the energy for a fake conversation."
ReplyDeleteI would like to point out that STM says 'like' and not 'want'. I've listened to it a couple of times now and it's definitely not 'want'.
(But I don't doubt your otherwise excellent transcribsion skills).
This reminds me of the Simpsons Halloween episode where Homer gets possessed by an evil toupee, which ends up getting shot repeatedly.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely LOVE all of these!
ReplyDeleteI would like to add my vote for "Zen" and "fake conversation" to be available on products. Pleasepleaseplease.
ReplyDeleteJust as James, I thought about The Simpsons, Treehouse of horror. The one where Homer gets Snakes hair. XD
ReplyDeletePerny
The ad just to the left of this comment box is for...... You guessed it! Wigs! How weird!
ReplyDeletemy ad is for hair transplants XD
ReplyDeleteI LOVE looking at what GoogleAds turns up every day! -Karen
ReplyDeleteEnjoy STM every day!! Thank you for sharing. *Must* have a shirt or a bag with the "fake conversation" quote on it. Please?!?
ReplyDeleteI just found your blog. It's so hilarious. I was laughing outloud at work today and everyone was looking at me funny. Thanks for sharing. It's great!
ReplyDeleteWith a ringtone, you'd have people wondering if it's the caller or the phone that doesn't have the energy for a fake conversation!
ReplyDeleteIf I didn't live in the dark ages with no ring tone options, I'd be clamoring for this one.
I suggest a more humane solution: just bombard it with hairspray until it's immobilized..... 7@=Q
ReplyDeleteI rather like the idea of a rabbit toupee - the hare club for men! ;-)
ReplyDeleteI can see the "fake conversation" on coffee mugs sitting on cubicle desks all across the English-speaking world...
ReplyDeleteWith the first comment on the "fake conversation" it sounds like he's doesn't want you instigating his talking at night or something like that.
ReplyDeleteI'm voting for the "fake-conversation" tee shirt as well!! How great to just get that out of the way, right up front!
ReplyDeleteIs there any chance of a "zen" card?
ReplyDeleteHaha, this is hilarious!
ReplyDeleteIn a bizarre coincidence, I wrote a poem in July called, "Don't Fuck with my Zen". Just thought I'd pass that along (I posted it here - http://elkindisguise.blogspot.com/2010/09/poetry-purge.html - in September after getting back from a summer on an isolated island. It's the last poem in the post).
ReplyDeleteRabid toupees, huh?
ReplyDelete