ok... had to listen to that numerous times before I could believe what I heard. then I still had to read it. now I can say..... bwahahahhaahahahaha that definately deserves a t shirt. IBS..... I agree with barkinkel, that brings on a whole new meaning for me.
Worked in a used bookstore. We had an interesting collection of photos that were used as bookmarks. As well as boarding passes, money, junk mail, real mail, strange greeting cards. You name it.
After using your potato chips for book marks, a heavy dusting of corn starch does a wonderful job of soaking up, and removing the grease.
"Imitation Bowel Syndrome" is an annoyance to be sure, but for a real mindfuck let the patient go into a "Full Blown Anal Episode"! This sad affliction usually leads to the most horrific displays imaginable! Acts so depraved, and malicious in their scope and atrocity that I have no word to describe them!
Dick Cheney, and Margret Thatcher drunk together at the pub is what I'm talking about here!
There are many home remedies for the "Full Blown Anal Episode", however, I have found that a bright rap to the forehead with a ball peen hammer gives the best results!
Some care must be exercised in the application of the treatment, since the side effect is a fractured skull! However if the patient is far enough along, a fractured skull my prove to be helpful!
@stoney - and here I was thinking a drunk Dick Cheney that is armed with a shotgun was bad enough, but you had to add Margret Thatcher eh? *shivers at the thought*
IBS takes on a whole new meaning for me from this point forward.
ReplyDeleteWhat?! Crisps make perfectly delicious bookmarks. Only problem is they keep breaking so I never really can tell what page I'm on...
ReplyDeleteok... had to listen to that numerous times before I could believe what I heard. then I still had to read it. now I can say..... bwahahahhaahahahaha that definately deserves a t shirt. IBS..... I agree with barkinkel, that brings on a whole new meaning for me.
ReplyDeleteChips (or crisps) make grease marks on your pages... Vanilla wafers are much better.
ReplyDeleteWork in a library. You'll see a lot more inappropriate items used as bookmarks: Bacon strips, slices of cheese, razor blades, endorsed checks...
ReplyDeleteWorked in a used bookstore. We had an interesting collection of photos that were used as bookmarks. As well as boarding passes, money, junk mail, real mail, strange greeting cards. You name it.
ReplyDeleteThere's the latest literary marketing trend: Edible Bookmarks!
ReplyDeleteNow we have to match the flavors with the genres...... 7@=Q
After using your potato chips for book marks, a heavy dusting of corn starch does a wonderful job of soaking up, and removing the grease.
ReplyDelete"Imitation Bowel Syndrome" is an annoyance to be sure, but for a real mindfuck let the patient go into a "Full Blown Anal Episode"! This sad affliction usually leads to the most horrific displays imaginable! Acts so depraved, and malicious in their scope and atrocity that I have no word to describe them!
Dick Cheney, and Margret Thatcher drunk together at the pub is what I'm talking about here!
There are many home remedies for the "Full Blown Anal Episode", however, I have found that a bright rap to the forehead with a ball peen hammer gives the best results!
Some care must be exercised in the application of the treatment, since the side effect is a fractured skull! However if the patient is far enough along, a fractured skull my prove to be helpful!
@stoney - and here I was thinking a drunk Dick Cheney that is armed with a shotgun was bad enough, but you had to add Margret Thatcher eh? *shivers at the thought*
ReplyDeletestoney - lol!! you are always so full of wisdom and wit
ReplyDeleteThat first one should be on a t-shirt!
ReplyDeleteI'd eat the chips before it could ever be successfully used as a bookmark. ;) I much prefer scraps of paper or actual bookmarks. :P
ReplyDelete