Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20100506

May 6 2010

"You give me stress, anxiety, days filled with woe. I give you, I don't know, a kick in the fucking balls. I think that kind of makes it fair. Arsehole."

"Shoot the fucking cellist. Pompous cunt with his oversized violin."

"I have succumbed to temptation! Mankini or body wax? Decisions, decisions..."

 or click here
"You didn't let me finish. You WERE a waste of space... In your mother's womb."
 or click here
__________

Karen's notes: Does it occur to anyone else that if one chooses to wear a mankini, one should ALSO get a body wax? Choosing between these options doesn't strike me as the best plan.

Added later: Ah! Someone made a comment that may have shed light on STM's difficult decision. They read it differently than I heard it, but I think they may be correct: "I think the waxing one was the choice between a "Mankini wax" or a whole body wax. Like women have a "Bikini wax"." That does make a lot more sense. Thanks, MsM!

40 comments:

  1. But if one gets a body wax before wearing a mankini, how will one show off one's profusion of manly chest hair?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Creepy. I saw a cello the other day and i called it a bass violin.

    ReplyDelete
  3. yeh,bring the Mankini on

    ReplyDelete
  4. Clearly the mankini one should be on a pair of underpants.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Awesome, just a ton of awesome!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ridanculous! We're so lucky to have Adam; a sleep talkin man who says FUNNY stuff in his sleep.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Does Adam ever remember who he's speaking to in his dreams or is it just words?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Karen, I'm with you...although personally I would be steering him away from either option. Yay Adam!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Jackie - He never remembers a single thing!

    ReplyDelete
  10. That's second one is AWESOME! I work in a violin shop with 2 cellists, so I'll definitely be sharing it with my colleagues!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Does Adam have any idea of what a body wax involves?!?!?!? Reminds me of Mel Gibson waxing his legs in What a Woman Wants. Not my idea of a good time.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Hey! I'm a cellist! Wait...no I'm not! Point the gun the other way!

    ReplyDelete
  13. So what does he have against cellists? (Thank goodness I play violin!)

    ReplyDelete
  14. You didn't let me finish is what he's saying, but the word you wrote is finished.

    ReplyDelete
  15. grammar nazi - use some punctuation would you? It took me ages to realise that I couldn't care less what you're on about. Being a pendant about this wonderful blogger and her amazing husband is more than slightly annoying. I think Adam is talking about you when he's being vicious

    ReplyDelete
  16. I think the waxing one was the choice between a "Mankini wax" or a whole body wax. Like women have a "Bikini wax".

    ReplyDelete
  17. Yeah, i was thinking the same as above.

    ReplyDelete
  18. based on the "king kong" photo you posted a few months ago, i don't think adam would enjoy a full body wax!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Where does he come up with these insults!? I can't even think of good insults when i'm awake. "You are a waste of space. Wait, you WERE a waste of space..." Classic.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Sounds like a new t-shirt! "Mankini or Body Wax? Decisions, Decisions!"

    ReplyDelete
  21. The film is called What Women Want, not What a Woman Wants

    ReplyDelete
  22. Rhythmic! The top could be a song - just add a backing beat and some pounding drums and it's the hate anthem of a generation!

    Always good stuff, unless you're a cellist...

    ReplyDelete
  23. Didn't Borat "popularize" the mankini? Did Borat get a body wax before he wore it? I don't think so. I think the whole point of wearing a mankini is to not shave beforehand.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Or maybe he meant this kind of mankini.
    http://i616.photobucket.com/albums/tt244/LadyKaya9/manbikini.jpg

    ReplyDelete
  25. Nooo!!! I am a cellist!!! Nooo!!!

    (At least I am a woman and not a man :P

    ReplyDelete
  26. Suppose you're a hairy guy, and you opt for the mankini wax, and then put on a mankini ... you still have the hair everywhere else! Wouldn't that look even more ridiculous than not waxing at all?

    ReplyDelete
  27. *snicker* i know it's STM talking... but if adam wanted to, he could probably raise a bunch of money for charity doing either wax style, live online. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  28. 2manywhiskers6 May 2010 at 22:55

    Anon at 21:54 - that is a HILARIOUS visual!!

    ReplyDelete
  29. I'm glad to see no one voted for the "Captain Fluffer" t-shirt in the poll. Anyone who would wear that is just asking to be investigated.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Don't shoot the cellist! D: We need more of those!

    ReplyDelete
  31. @MIchelle: Be careful! What if someone ordered a "Mankini or body wax?" T-shirt in XXL? It could destroy civilization as we know it! 70=E

    @Anon at 14:58: You're right - I don't suppose Karen would enjoy wearing a grammar nazi around her neck........ 7@=Q

    ReplyDelete
  32. ahahahahahahahahaha, these be some great one liners- great post today- thanks for the laugh!

    ReplyDelete
  33. "Shoot the fucking cellist. Pompous cunt with his oversized violin."
    Bwahahahaha, that is just superb

    ReplyDelete
  34. NewMexicanAnnie8 May 2010 at 07:34

    Thank God I play everything *but* the cello!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  35. Adams has now something against cellists too. I think I have to protects my sister's eyes too. Of course also my own dignity I made her play Cello because I play Violin *imagine evil laughter*

    ReplyDelete
  36. Quite frankly, I think he should opt for a mankini, but without the body wax.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Maybe I'm weird, but I'm a cellist, and I LOVED that one. Now I want to see that on a t-shirt!

    ReplyDelete
  38. Over this years, the mbqngta normal look on Oakley Sunglasses Cheap design has become tweaked in Half X Oakley addition to altered, but this Oakley Sunglasses Discount straight in addition to strong Sale Oakley Sunglasses wrinkles remain to make certain Oakley Jawbone look eminently eternal and create elegance to help any hip wardrobe. The description Oakley Stpl Jawbone these appealing sunglasses need to have captivated people, right! And Half X that you are currently on the lookout for a acceptable store that has you this widest offering of Oakley Sunglasses Outlet at hugely competitive premiums.

    ReplyDelete