Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20100506

May 6 2010

"You give me stress, anxiety, days filled with woe. I give you, I don't know, a kick in the fucking balls. I think that kind of makes it fair. Arsehole."

"Shoot the fucking cellist. Pompous cunt with his oversized violin."

"I have succumbed to temptation! Mankini or body wax? Decisions, decisions..."

 or click here
"You didn't let me finish. You WERE a waste of space... In your mother's womb."
 or click here
__________

Karen's notes: Does it occur to anyone else that if one chooses to wear a mankini, one should ALSO get a body wax? Choosing between these options doesn't strike me as the best plan.

Added later: Ah! Someone made a comment that may have shed light on STM's difficult decision. They read it differently than I heard it, but I think they may be correct: "I think the waxing one was the choice between a "Mankini wax" or a whole body wax. Like women have a "Bikini wax"." That does make a lot more sense. Thanks, MsM!

37 comments:

  1. But if one gets a body wax before wearing a mankini, how will one show off one's profusion of manly chest hair?

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  2. Creepy. I saw a cello the other day and i called it a bass violin.

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  3. yeh,bring the Mankini on

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  4. Clearly the mankini one should be on a pair of underpants.

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  5. Awesome, just a ton of awesome!

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  6. Ridanculous! We're so lucky to have Adam; a sleep talkin man who says FUNNY stuff in his sleep.

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  7. Does Adam ever remember who he's speaking to in his dreams or is it just words?

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  8. Karen, I'm with you...although personally I would be steering him away from either option. Yay Adam!

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  9. Jackie - He never remembers a single thing!

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  10. That's second one is AWESOME! I work in a violin shop with 2 cellists, so I'll definitely be sharing it with my colleagues!

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  11. Does Adam have any idea of what a body wax involves?!?!?!? Reminds me of Mel Gibson waxing his legs in What a Woman Wants. Not my idea of a good time.

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  12. Hey! I'm a cellist! Wait...no I'm not! Point the gun the other way!

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  13. So what does he have against cellists? (Thank goodness I play violin!)

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  14. You didn't let me finish is what he's saying, but the word you wrote is finished.

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  15. grammar nazi - use some punctuation would you? It took me ages to realise that I couldn't care less what you're on about. Being a pendant about this wonderful blogger and her amazing husband is more than slightly annoying. I think Adam is talking about you when he's being vicious

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  16. I think the waxing one was the choice between a "Mankini wax" or a whole body wax. Like women have a "Bikini wax".

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  17. Yeah, i was thinking the same as above.

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  18. based on the "king kong" photo you posted a few months ago, i don't think adam would enjoy a full body wax!

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  19. Where does he come up with these insults!? I can't even think of good insults when i'm awake. "You are a waste of space. Wait, you WERE a waste of space..." Classic.

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  20. Sounds like a new t-shirt! "Mankini or Body Wax? Decisions, Decisions!"

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  21. The film is called What Women Want, not What a Woman Wants

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  22. Rhythmic! The top could be a song - just add a backing beat and some pounding drums and it's the hate anthem of a generation!

    Always good stuff, unless you're a cellist...

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  23. Didn't Borat "popularize" the mankini? Did Borat get a body wax before he wore it? I don't think so. I think the whole point of wearing a mankini is to not shave beforehand.

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  24. Or maybe he meant this kind of mankini.
    http://i616.photobucket.com/albums/tt244/LadyKaya9/manbikini.jpg

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  25. Nooo!!! I am a cellist!!! Nooo!!!

    (At least I am a woman and not a man :P

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  26. Suppose you're a hairy guy, and you opt for the mankini wax, and then put on a mankini ... you still have the hair everywhere else! Wouldn't that look even more ridiculous than not waxing at all?

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  27. *snicker* i know it's STM talking... but if adam wanted to, he could probably raise a bunch of money for charity doing either wax style, live online. ;-)

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  28. 2manywhiskers6 May 2010 at 22:55

    Anon at 21:54 - that is a HILARIOUS visual!!

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  29. I'm glad to see no one voted for the "Captain Fluffer" t-shirt in the poll. Anyone who would wear that is just asking to be investigated.

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  30. Don't shoot the cellist! D: We need more of those!

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  31. @MIchelle: Be careful! What if someone ordered a "Mankini or body wax?" T-shirt in XXL? It could destroy civilization as we know it! 70=E

    @Anon at 14:58: You're right - I don't suppose Karen would enjoy wearing a grammar nazi around her neck........ 7@=Q

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  32. ahahahahahahahahaha, these be some great one liners- great post today- thanks for the laugh!

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  33. NewMexicanAnnie8 May 2010 at 07:34

    Thank God I play everything *but* the cello!!!!!!!

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  34. Adams has now something against cellists too. I think I have to protects my sister's eyes too. Of course also my own dignity I made her play Cello because I play Violin *imagine evil laughter*

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  35. Quite frankly, I think he should opt for a mankini, but without the body wax.

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  36. Maybe I'm weird, but I'm a cellist, and I LOVED that one. Now I want to see that on a t-shirt!

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