Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20100709

July 9 2010

"Right, like I joined to get fit. I joined for the mirrors!"

 or click here
"Scuse me. 'Scuse me, have you got a- Oh! Sorry, wrong shop."
 or click here
"Oh! It's so cute. Now put it back in the fucking box. It makes me want to puke."
 or click here
__________

Karen's notes: Adam just joined a new gym, and yesterday he worked out for the first time in over a year. If I had known his true motivation, I would have hidden all our mirrors to get him to join earlier!

In the second one, I imagine he's out shopping for, like, a new spatula, and he suddenly realizes that he's entered a hard-core sex shop.

As for the final one... I don't know. What's cute and comes in a box?


37 comments:

  1. maybe a puppy on christmas morning? for the third one?

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  2. My initial reaction to the first one was that he wants to secretly look at other people using the mirrors. But I see your point, Adam's alternate sleep talking persona probably wants to look at himself.

    As for the last one, I immediately came to think of SNL's "Dick in a Box" digital short sketch. But that definitely doesn't answer your question about what's cute and comes in a box.

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  3. Poor kittens in need of a good home? is he a kitten hater?

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  4. I'm thinking stuffed animal of some kind or figurine or I dunno...anyhoo,

    LMAO!!! All three of them are so funny! LOL @ Karen for hiding mirrors comment!

    Love these ones with the voice changing so dramatically.

    LMAO @ Andreas B and mention of "Dick in a Box" now that's classic...but I still say "Cork Soakers" is the Ultimate Classic!!!

    K, I'm done rambling now ;-)

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  5. sex shop? hard core? really karen, you do embarrass me!!

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  6. Nothing wrong with sex shops. :p I usually go for the leather floggers....

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  7. Schrödinger's Cat?

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  8. maybe its a cute little doll baby, adam, do you have something you wish to confess? ;)

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  9. It could be a woozle... YEAH it's a real animal, check it on google if you don't believe me!!!!!!! And, can you try to make a facebook page please????

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  10. I listened to the lot of them before going on to Karen's notes. I don't know if I should be pleased or embarrased that the sex shop scenario was exactly what I had in mind. Though looking for a spatula in one is just too hilarious :).

    Also, the first one could make for a great T-shirt to wear to the gym (or, should you ever start selling them, plastic water bottles), for those of us more... physically inclined than myself.

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  11. Dick in the box. Of course.

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  12. Going to the gym for the mirrors...that would be the LAST reason for me to join up. Just too scary a view, I'm afraid.

    Cute and in a box but makes him want to puke...hmmmm...how about a framed picture of a kitten, made from....wait for it....lentils!?!?!

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  13. I admit it- I ended up Bing-ing woozle. They are not real! I'm a sucker

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  14. What about the zhu zhu pets? They are cute and comes in boxes, but kind of annoying and don't do much. This is what they look like: http://cache.kotaku.com/assets/images/9/2009/12/pets.jpg

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  15. I loved this one so much as a work-out shirt, I already got it into the shop! -karen

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  16. Hmmmmm... what comes in a box, is cute, but suddenly becomes repulsive.... I'm stumped but it might link to the hard core sex shop idea earlier.

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  17. I'm the same guy as the above comment and I think the "It's so cute" comment is a joke and is a sarcastic remark from STM. I think he came across a box of dildos or something and was immediately disgusted.... idk, just a stupid thought.

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  18. I'LL TELL YOU WHAT'S CUTE AND COMES IN A BOX...

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  19. Schrödinger's Cat? I think that's quite possible

    STM thinks it a lovely cute living kitteh, but, shock, horror, it turns out it's dead. Awww

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  20. hhhmmm.... well, when you get a new hamster the pet store puts it in a box for you? maybe that's what he was talking about?
    STM makes my day all the time :D

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  21. Concur with the dick in a box comments, anything questionable and mysterious that could be in a box has to be. I bet that a lot of people go to the gym for the mirrors... ESP in Cali

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  22. lol For me "cute in a box" would be shoes but I'm sure that's not the case for STM. I'm guessing some kind of animal since STM seems to dislike anything cute.

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  23. Perhaps its whatever he was trying to buy at the shop?

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  24. If this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F1gmbOAAXtA&feature=related

    is in STM's dreams, I think maybe I'm a little disturbed.

    Then again, I'm not so sure sleeping Adam would find that terribly repulsive, being "Captain Bollocks of the Good Ship Scrotum" and all :D

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  25. Maybe its one of those pet rocks in the box. Those make me want to puke.

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  26. I immediately thought it was a little kitty. The box would have holes in it of course, I'm not a freak!

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  27. Ok, for the mirrors comment, I thought he just wanted to look at himself; as in, he doesnt need the equipment, cuz he's already a sexy beast! lol

    And for the shop comment, my thoughts were the exact opposite. I assumed he was in a NORMAL shop and about to ask for something... well, not very appropriate.

    I was thinking a jack in the box for the last comment. They can be cute, but the way they bob up and down can make someone a little queasy.

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  28. Who says you can't get a spatula in a sex shop? What do you mean Wal-Mart isn't a sex shop?

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  29. I believe that the "cute in a box" is obviously...

    http://www.ding.net/bonsaikitten/gray.html

    Bonsai Kitten!

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  30. I bet I could find some stuff to use for sex at Wal-Mart, but then again, I'm a pervert.

    Ok, the gym comment would be perfect for my husband's birthday if it was on a t-shirt! I can't get him to the gym very often at all.

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  31. Ok, so I didn't look first...t-shirt ordered. I think my family is going to be recipients of sleeptalkinman t-shirts for years to come!

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  32. Prof. ZzzMAN-ylizer10 July 2010 08:15

    "Right, like I joined to get fit. I joined for the mirrors!"
    "Scuse me. 'Scuse me, have you got a- Oh! Sorry, wrong shop."
    "Oh! It's so cute. Now put it back in the fucking box. It makes me want to puke."

    mirror - mirror (image) on the wall
    whose the (sea) fareest Adam of all

    reflective object surfaced in plane sight
    curved 2bee magnified, though diminished,
    to focused, or even distorted

    through the lookin' glass of personal groomin'
    in decoratin' or architect-dualling,
    oh the dualisms,
    telescoped and lasered,
    a radiating beamed instrument
    in wave lengths, invisible lighting
    our ways, outward

    a snapsh*t picture, shot of the past,
    presenting and futuristical, of one's other half
    from another entity, cud it be?...
    ~~~ ONESELF in a BOX.... cubed, caged and stuffed...

    . . . now STM would be sick over it, if this was for real... in essence,
    IT BE...to be FREE or not2be
    then, IT really is! (marlothomas)

    ... just, freeee to BE...you and me

    itza colourfull world,
    mirror. MIRROR...on the wall...
    oh right, scuse me...sorry, fit to be tied to catch
    . . . up daily, ina wayly way. whaley.

    - just couldn't resist entering the mirrors edge, so smoothe, jagged and a twinship world -

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  33. Maybe the boxed thing was a gerbil.. STM seems to have a fondness for gerbils... (and hamsters and jellyfish and ponys) or maybe it was just rodent like. Rodents of most kinds first come in little card board boxes from pet stores.

    maybe he was looking to buy a new hamster to jockey for? or a harness and saddle for his gerbil?

    The first one doesn't surprise me. STM is always impressed with himself. :)

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  34. as for what could have been in the box- i immediately thought a hamster or something similar because those are usually in the temporary boxes to carry them home like they give at petco and probably most pet stores, puppies or kittens wouldn't (at least in normal peoples dreams) been in a closed box

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  35. Did you by any chance see Con Air lately? There's a line about the cuddly toy that the main character has bought for his daughter: Put the bunny back in the box. Maybe STM was inspired :)

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  36. "As for the final one... I don't know. What's cute and comes in a box?"

    Babies?

    *cough*

    I'm just sayin'...

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