Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20110802

August 2 2011

"Ice cream is my first line of defense. There is no second."

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"Mother fucker. Have some of that! Want some dessert? Come back for more then. This one's sweeter... Fucking butterflies."
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And here is the must-hear conclusion of that last one...


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STM: Fucking butterflies... (smacks own face)
ADAM: AH! What did you do?
KAREN: Nothing!
ADAM: Did I do it?
KAREN: You thought I slapped you?
ADAM: I saw the thing in your hand, I thought you may have dropped it on my head.
KAREN: Wait a minute. I just need to make sure I understand. You didn't even— You thought it was m— You—
ADAM: Hello?
KAREN: I just wanna— Can I establish a fact? You actually thought the big blunt thing that smacked you in the face was—
ADAM: Be nicer about my hand.
KAREN: — a different object than your hand? You didn't realize it was you who slapped you?
ADAM: Well, I opened my eyes with my cheek stinging, and I saw you holding the microphone, and I thought maybe that had dropped onto my face.
KAREN: Do you realize something wrong with what you just said? I'm just gonna repeat it back to you verbatim: "I saw you were holding the microphone—"
ADAM: Yes, but you may have picked it back up—
KAREN: Oh, okay. But I will tell you what happened, Baby. Right before you woke up, you were saying—
ADAM: It stings!
KAREN: Listen: I'm gonna tell you what you were saying. I think it will illuminate. You were saying, "Mother fucker, take some of that! Fucking butterflies." (giggling) They were butterflies!
ADAM: Bastards.
__________

Karen's notes: So sorry about the faulty transcription yesterday, guys. I promise I was not trying to censor STM (a bit late for that, isn't it?). It was just a bizarre error for which I have no explanation. All fixed now.

5 comments:

  1. perhaps before bed you should remember to put out the cat(erpillars)...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Mmm, ice cream...

    Watch out for those killer butterflies!

    ReplyDelete
  3. It kind of sounds like STM was taking his own advice and using ice cream as a line of defense against the butterflies. He did ask them if they wanted dessert! Too bad Adam did not use ice cream against the butterflies as well; he would not have awoken to the stinging cheek that he had given himself, if Adam had only heeded STM's advice this time!

    ReplyDelete
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