Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20100216

Feb 16 2010

"Forks. Forks to the left. To the left! No, greasy mugs go there. You really have everything ass-fucked backwards, don't you."

"Why don't you make your mouth useful. Say goodbye."

"You've got to save the curtains! Save the curtains... They hold so many secrets."

"Please bounce on my bed with me. Bounce with me. Because there's nothing more romantic than bouncing..... Boing."

__________

Karen's note: I've never mentioned that Adam also has a funny way of waking up. Adam goes from dead asleep to fully cognizant in a single moment. He's what you might call a morning person. For example, this morning, he was lying there, breathing slowly and deeply, dead to the world. Suddenly, his eyes popped open and he announced, "Ear plugs. We have to get ear plugs for honeymoon. We don't know how loud it will be in the jungle." And this was not something out of a dream, or part of his sleep-talking. This was an entirely relevant, perfectly-formed thought. What a freak.

Oh, hey, we just enabled fan photos on the Facebook page.

58 comments:

  1. I love today's last phrase. :D

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  2. n i love the one about the curtains..
    thanks...sending lots of love

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  3. I am amused by today's phrases.

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  4. Oh man, I wish I was such a "morning" person. The first fifteen minutes of speech from me is "Bruialdhghoiugun...nbobug...no.....go away"

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  5. Are you a morning person as well or is it a royal pain in the a**e? I can barely form a single thought before 10am...

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  6. I've had a full 4 hours of waking time already and I'm still not fully functional. How does he do it!

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  7. yeah, i am certainly one of those bright and bushy-tailed morning people.

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  8. Love them all obviously, but have snagged the curtains one for toadys FB status. (don't worry, I linked you!)

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  9. Thank god, I am also a morning person.

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  10. yes but your mornings start bloody early baby!

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  11. LOVE the bounce on the bed one! lol Boing!

    as far as mornings go (unless i've been up all night such as oh, right now) UGH!

    I'm more of a night owl which sucks cause everything seems to be all about the morning.

    Oh, and also am quite amused with the mouth...usefull!

    Cheers from an insomiac from Sask., Canada!

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  12. I'm not fully awake til I need to go to sleep again the next night.
    Which defeats the purpose somewhat.

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  13. Anyone who approaches me before 11 am has a high probability to die that day. Mornings are the worst! :)

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  14. Some of his best sleeptime musings! How you get any sleep is a wonder though.

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  15. love the bouny 1 im not fully alive till at least 12. im a nice girl

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  16. i meant night not nice lol ^^^^^^^^^^

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  17. All are good, Goodbye & Curtains: T-Shirts!

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  18. Ass Fucked Backwards... that's me in the morning! lol
    Thanks again Adam and Karen for helping to start the day with a smile!

    Sherri - Canada

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  19. OH man. I am about to send these to the husband. They will make his day. LOL.

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  20. You like repeating shit dontcha?? Honestly I laughed the hardest about the ear plugs..hilarious!! Karen and Adam you should consider doing a live web cast of Adam for just one night..that would be tits!

    -Ambyr from WI

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  21. Make your mouth useful.... classic!!!

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  22. I'm only a morning person if I'm still awake from the night before....nope, I have no fondness for the am part of the day. Thanks for easing me into another day

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  23. I honestly love these... thankyou so much for sharing them all... they give me a laugh :)

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  24. "Forks. Forks to the left. To the left! No, greasy mugs go there. You really have everything ass-fucked backwards, don't you."

    It's nice to know that SOMEone is still concerned about proper table etiquette! :-P

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  25. Prof. ZzzMAN-ylizer16 February 2010 16:14

    another jOlly day...the mornings are always young and the very earliest the better! to make the most of the day cut short if not an early riser...i.am.A.M. and will it 2B a :) one ...no matters, thru thick or thins.

    in having one is gerneral; in Creating a g'day is something much more ;) will.i.AM?
    ( only after a good rested p.m...oui?)

    so~ono, another itchin' analyzing moment is stirring up (justopit! this, messin'brainfood;)... ...could it be a throwto a Gordon Ramsey Hells Kitchen behind closed curtains and veiled nightmare to a pleasant customer experience...that's for waking A.daM. to find out what sleeperP.irate adaM. is up to bouncin' hollyjollying away with his pogo stick on the bed of his dreams...the secrets are waiting to be cracking =0<> up...er, opened yet still...
    bo.in.gittyup...

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  26. Prof. ZzzMAN-ylizer16 February 2010 16:27

    ooops did i say that...i lost my head...i shud reread and watch my typos now and again...not thinkin' sumtimes before the fingers run off away from me...never mind!

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  27. it l@@ks like JUNGLE FEVER is here to stay...
    ask King Kong aaaahhhhhhhhaaaaaaahhhhhhhh ear
    plugaaaaahhhhaaaaahh

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  28. Just brilliant! Everyone in the office thinks I'm insane because their day is punctuated by spontaneous eruptions of laughter from reception....

    Love it! Thanks for this!

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  29. Wow! I made a page just like this with/of my wife back in 2007. No vampire penguins, but still. Stop by!

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  30. 2nd guy here again 2 things:
    1. thanx for replyin to bushbaby comment adam.
    2. of course ppl will think ur mad S.M. Maybe cos u luagh so much, or maybe bcuase u r... (jst joking XD)

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  31. 2 things... this is gettin to be habit (has any1 noticed how i do 1 comment after another? 2 again!)

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  32. "Make your mouth useful"...glad I didn't know this one when I worked with one particularly annoying boss...
    Thanks again for my laugh of the day, each and every day!

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  33. It was probably a pirate dinner he was supervising: pirates are known to be rather particular about their table settings...... and the mugs *have* to be properly greased; otherwise, the rum tends to eat through the pewter (especially when you've mixed it with gunpowder)...... 7@=Q

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  34. Hey A&K, I just caught the train home & found a little section of graffiti saying 'I wanna be a panda' followed by a small drawing of a panda. Now, I don't condone graffiti or defacing public transport but Adam your ramblings are really getting around... Literally!!!

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  35. Wow - *that* is being a morning person.

    Today's favorite for me: "Save the curtains... They hold so many secrets." But "Say goodbye" got a LOL!

    Yes - laugh of the day, each and every day. :)

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  36. Love todays quotes and I support the idea of a live webcast, it would be a thrill to sit up all night waiting for some live action!

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  37. to Bear Grylls at 22:59
    as an anonymous blog reader
    who enjoys the blog and the audio-
    i don't support the live webcast idea
    i find it intruding Adam's&Karen's privacy...
    -unless they disagree with me...

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  38. Canadian Guy (Same as Yesterday)17 February 2010 01:32

    About the morning person thing... I have no recollection of anything for the first minute. I usually just sit in bed 'cause I'm not sure if I need to wake up or not. After 1 minute I am wide awake.

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  39. oh my I was laughing so hard this time. I love the forks quote!! and the one about saying good bye.

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  40. Oh my...these had to be favoritists yet. I really don't think that previous word is actually a real word, but oh well. :)

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  41. Have you ever try to talk to him? One of my friend talk in his sleep and we always talked him and he would answer us with something random but kind of on topic.

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  42. Regarding the webcast..I wasn't saying EVERY night..just one night. It would maybe recruit some sceptics on board..and I'm sure by now, you have enough followers that we would actually hang out and listen! Make sure to watch some Animal planet before bed, and Karen, make sure to poke at his feet ;D

    p.s it would make my day if one of you responded to me :D :D

    -Ambyr from WI

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  43. Ambyr,

    thanks for your comments. the video thing does hold some interest for me, but really i do feel it does break that fianl intiamcy barrier that i am just not comfortable with. in terms of 'recruiting the sceptics', i don't believe there is anything we can do, should do or want to do to convince these people. Anything produced will surely be seen as faked by some and both Karen and I feel we simply do not have anything to prove.

    thanks for your support.

    Adam

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  44. Yay, lol! Thanks for responding!

    I totally understand. It was just a suggestion :)

    BTW I told all of my friends and family about you guys!

    Keep up the good work guys
    <3

    Ambyr

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  45. Adam,

    Skeptics require evidence in order to believe something, so clearly there are MANY things you could do to convince them. A skeptics mind is NOT already made up, he/she simply refuses to believe based on faith alone.

    The whole idea that someone makes such neat quotes when asleep seems so unbelievable that I am surprised at the way people who don't believe it are treated on here. Wouldn't it be normal and rational to doubt to a bizarre and unsual claim?

    Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. Right?

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  46. I think the forks and greasy mugs could also refer to placement of dishes in a dish washer. In any event it made me LOL for a good while, cause I can just imagine disgruntled sleepy Adam giving dish washer instructions.

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  47. Anonymous 13:38

    You are suprised by the way skeptics are treated on here? I'm suprised by how rude the skeptics are. Name calling Adam and Karen and even the visitors of the blog is childish and not worth anyone's time. If someone has a question, all they have to do is ask...politely. Adam and Karen (if you read other comments) always answer the questions that are asked. They won't do live video feed, and that is completely understandable. I'm sure skeptics would even question those, however. If skeptics want to be treated more kindly on this blog, they need to take a step back and be more kind themselves. Just because you disagree or don't believe doesn't mean you have to be cruel. And is there really any evidence they could provide (without crossing a personal line) that would make believers out of everyone?

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  48. Is there anything they could really do?

    Yes, they could go to a sleep lab.

    Researchers can measure brain activity when someone is asleep. In fact, I believe they'd be very interested in case like this.

    Adam, why not put yourself forward for a night in a sleep research lab? It would silence the skeptics once and for all, and it prove valuable for scienctific understanding of sleep, speech and consciousness. I expect the clarity, consistency and content of Adam's sleeptalking is almost, if not entirely, unique, and should therefore be understood.

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  49. I have been randomly posting Adams talkin on FB.....where is your page?

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  50. I love saving the curtains! lol

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  51. Karen, I just wanted to post that I think the sleep talking and the style of waking up might have something in common. I also talk constantly in my sleep (I'll even open my eyes and sit up to have a conversation with my girlfriend, though having no recollection of it the next day), and I wake up the same way...From absolutely asleep to completely awake and ready to take on the day instantly...Strange isn't it?

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  52. bouncing ..boing !!!! so much fun !! :)

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  53. This is so hilarious yet so genuine
    loved reading it
    specially the end para

    maahn i too talk sometimes while sleeping now i wonder what i say

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  54. These are great! They really make my day...I'm trying to catch up now. Thanks for sharing!

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  55. i just love the one about the curtains :D

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