Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)


Mar 6 2010

"I just don't like those german shepherds and their achtung sheep."

"Come close. I want to make sure you don't miss one bit of this: Cock off, cunt face!"


  1. The second one... I said something like that once to a friend.

    Yes, they are still my friend.

    I want that on a shirt, by the way.

  2. LMAO @ Cock off cunt face! love it!
    P.S. Is Cock off similar to F*ck off?? (for us Canadians out here ;-) )

  3. nah nobody really says 'cock off'here in England. funny though!!

  4. Yea actually, they do... although most of us would just say Fuck off instead! And yes it means the same.

  5. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  6. 10:12-
    Don't be a dick, dude. I'll have you know I say stuff like this in my sleep a lot. Just because its never happened to you doesn't mean it's not possible.

    In other words: Don't hate because your ignorant.

  7. If it is fake I think all of the swearing would be hurting STM's bottom line; I mean how many places can you go to wearing a 'Cock Off, Cunt Face' T-shirt? The only places I would even think of wearing it would be the gym or some dive bar, and I probably wouldn't even do that. Just like movie studios do everything to avoid the NC-17 tag, I think STM would do everything they could to write marketable (non-expletive filled) quotes.

  8. Prof. ZzzMAN-ylizer6 March 2010 at 10:58

    Another adamtastic in a mudpile messpit:

    "I just don't like those german shepherds and their achtung sheep."

    ---> Calling all German Shepards/sheepishly grinning that SleepyAdam is feeling cornered standin' out in the field in his pj's - - - they're none too friendly to him today it seems, (wonder 'why'), but We are having no problems with these furry friends

    ACHTUNG being a German word meaning - - -
    Mission Top Secret! and also just as much as
    it means in many ways and said, as so too below:

    Attention! L O.O k Out! -- Heads up! -- Nix! -- Watch out! -- Mind the step! -- Construction Site Ahead! -- On your mark! ready,, go! -- blasting in progress!

    -- Danger! Falling stones! -- attention minefield! -- respect for each other -- highest consideration--
    --high regard -- dignified -- awe-inspiring --esteem -- deference -- imposing --
    -- to pay tribute! -- Prayer Attention!
    -- Well done! -- I take my hat off to you! --
    Good for you / her / him / them!

    ... so many meanings,. . .So Little Time ;)

    ===>> it reads as a sheepskin novel booked in its journey to hard cover, and forever worldlywidely&webbly put; it's power to the flock of dolly sheep, all the woolly mammothed and rhinoed in a herd 2B heard...bbbbbbbbbbbbbb bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaabbbbbbbbabbbbbbb bbbbbbbbbbbaaaaaaaaa dddddd

    "Come close. I want to make sure you don't miss one bit of this: Cock off, cunt face!"

    ...was his drowsy-only retort to back off
    [ sheepishly of course ] in his designer lambskin jacket and woolly slippers he figured they'd get
    the 'message' as he tries to slip slide and away... out of this fine mess!

  9. "I mean how many places can you go to wearing a 'Cock Off, Cunt Face' T-shirt?"

    Any bloody place you please. Nobody can tell you not to. All they can do is be disgusted. And, honestly, who cares? If you live your life to please other (Unimportant) people, you end up looking foolish.

  10. There's not many heterosexual men (if any) I know that would where my Frank N. Furter 'He's just a Sweet Transvestite, Transsexual, from Transylvania T-shirt'; so following the norm isn't high on my list, but neither is being a rude pig: I hate that society makes me suffer these 'people', thus why I wouldn't where a 'Cock Off' shit.

    Perhaps a little too revealing there: so be it!

  11. LOL.. love those achtung sheep!

  12. Awwww I like German Shepherds...not so sure about the achtung sheep though! lol
    Love the Frank N. Furter visual too!

  13. This is pure comedy genius and I tell people to cock off all the time!! You go dude!!

    and to those of you who this this is all shit, why the hell are you wasting your time to post on it??? I mean really just COCK OFF will ya!!

  14. Achtung Sheep!! That was my grampa's impression of a german shepherd. :D

  15. @Prof. ZzzMAN-ylizer:
    "Achtung" actually means just "Attention" without any further context.

    We have "achtung" signs that warn drivers that deer might cross the road. But i have never seen that sign with sheep on it. Would be nice explanation for "achtung sheep" though. :-)

    Greetings from Germany...

  16. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  17. If a German was a Shepherd buy profession, his sheep would snap to attention at his presence.

  18. LOL at the "achtung sheep"!! I'm seeing all the sheep at rigid attention and then marching along in formation, stepping in time.

    (an aside)For anyone who hasn't seen the Baaa Studs and Extreme Sheepherding:

    VonMalcolm - thanks for the RHPS memory trigger! :) And a giggle at the word choice "a little too revealing."

    For those who wonder why comments get deleted - would you host a blog and then welcome strangers (like Anon 10:12) who don't know you from Adam (sorry, couldn't resist :-)) flat out calling you liars in quite a nasty way? I mean... come on. Would you?

    Anon 15:36 - how come you couldn't just say "I think this is fake"? Why did you have to be so sarcastic and nasty? That's what lots of us wonder.

    Anon 15:09 - yeah, yeah, those are the sheep I saw in my head! LOL

  19. Just this morning my boyfriend said this in his sleep as I was leaving the room: You can't take that! You don't listen, you just take stuff! Fuck you guys...
    :P So, there.
    I think it's silly that people have to take time to yell about how they think it's fake. If you don't like it--go away and leave the people that do in peace.

  20. 'achtung sheep' sign heh heh...I once had a dream where there was a 'stop if you want' sign.

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  22. Personally, I think this is genuine - having apparently said some pretty outrageous things in my sleep myself. However, even if it IS fake - it's still funny as hell and I get a laugh every morning reading it. So who CARES if it's real or fake? Just ENJOY it. And if you don't enjoy it, why bother reading it?

  23. "Cock off" is a favourite saying of James May's (a British TV presenter) so perhaps Adam is a fan of his?

  24. Prof. ZzzMAN-ylizer6 March 2010 at 17:27

    ...good Germany...and at anonymous

    ...checkin' in an read some more funnies...

    i was googling meanings and several sites came in

    with my history-days lesson where the word is used

    in different instince here was:

    hope this helps and there's no test for the
    'mad professsor' who learns with google-eyed
    black framed esteamed up coke bottles to see with
    and a magnifier to work with as me eyesight has been getting a bit off these days ;) oh deer!

  25. And I thought guys in Montana were the ones with a "thing" for sheep...

  26. Prof. ZzzMAN-ylizer6 March 2010 at 18:06

    before i run along again...i just took a quickie to
    this site and i was floored with "farm art" who
    knew!...thanks a heap'ana'bunch to - - -

    2manywhiskers ---who wrote l.e.d. us to brighten the day:

    (an aside)For anyone who hasn't seen the Baaa Studs and Extreme Sheepherding:

    - that was more knowledge and not TMI to my bruised knoggan after tobagganing down slipper slopes and uphill battles these days to another high trip to the Alps...whooooooshh....

  27. "Anon 15:09 - yeah, yeah, those are the sheep I saw in my head! LOL"

    Oops - make that Anon 15:37. These time references trip me up.

  28. Prof - I love those guys too - totally amazing and "who knew" for sure!

    Watch out for those slopes-n-hills. :)

  29. I you guys for doing this blog. It makes me laugh, and we all need more laughter. Thank you! :)

    I'm sorry you have so many people that think it's not real. Do we really truly know that anything is really real though? I think it's much more funny when you believe it's real... as I do. :)

  30. The extreme sheep herding was ridiculous! Thanks for sharing that link, too funny!

  31. Don't be too hard on the sheep: they were just following herders..... 7@=Q

  32. God! Adam, I just LOVE your sleep-silliness!! Thanks so much for all of it!!!!

  33. Another thought came to my mind:

    Maybe with "german shepherd" he means "the shepherd who is german" (human) and the actual "german shepherd" (the dog) is the "achtung sheep".

    Would make sense... :-D

    Again, greetings from Germany...

  34. Oh deer!

    (Greetings and so on..)

  35. "Cock off, cunt face!" Brilliant, just brilliant. Been following this blog on my RSS reader for awhile now, and that one made me come and comment :)

  36. So does she like record him, or does she randomly stay up? Guessing she records him but just checking.... haha

  37. well a pal of mine she talks in her sleep bugger knows what she says as it is all in french which is strange as she is a pure australian

  38. Von Maldumb;
    Where were you where you can wear wares like that?

  39. Anon 8:27;
    She used to stay up, but discovered the miraculous voice-activated recorder, which reduced the bags under her eyes wonderfully! :)