Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20100512

May 12 2010

"A vegetarian restaurant seems a fucking stupid idea. Just pitch a tent over a vegetable patch. Job done."

 or click here
"If I'm gonna spend the day with you, I'd seriously consider chewing razor blades and sucking lemons, simply to pass the time."
 or click here

22 comments:

  1. thanks
    very useful

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  2. Another anti-vegetarian comment. At least he's consistent?

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  3. Every time I read Adam's one-liners I think: You can't make this stuff up, oh wait, he just did! I'm amazed. How is it possible that someone constantly creates the kind of material in his sleep that Hollywood writers can't produce while awake??

    I can truly see several of Adam's comments as lines in movies, plays or books! For example "If I'm gonna spend the day with you, I'd seriously consider chewing razor blades and sucking lemons, simply to pass the time" could easily have been a line in a movie written by Tarantino.

    You know what? I'm repeating myself. I realize now that every time I comment on this blog I do so to express my astonishment over how excellent material Adam's comments are. But I bet I'm going to do it again, soon.

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  4. NewMexicanAnnie12 May 2010 08:07

    I think STM's right about the vegetarian restaurant. I bet vegans are especially bad. (Pardon me, please, vegans!) I wonder how many waiters/waitresses at vegetarian restaurants get customers who want to know about their food source in detail and ask: Fair trade tea or not? Organic or not? Planted on the second Thursday of May with a light rain falling or not? Hehehehehehee! Maybe being a server in a veggie restaurant would be easier if people could see their food source for themselves. Yay, STM!

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  5. I'm a veggie and I'd like to say most of us are really not that bad! So long as there's no dead animals in sight I'll eat pretty much anything!
    Its the waiters in non-veggie restaurants that have it hard, especially if their menus aren't very clear.

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  6. Well, if Adam ever wanted to pursue another line of work, I'm sure that one of the card companies that specialize in the "insult card", would snap him up in a heartbeat! Shoot, find a friend that is a bit of an artist and start your own line of cards Adam and Karen! Like the t-shirts, I'd have plenty of cards on hand, cause you just never know when you might need to throw a zinger at a "friend" or just a plain idiot, lol.

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  7. My mom has often called me the vegetarian who hates vegetables. I do eat a lot more vegetables than I did before I went veggie, but I'm still kind of picky about which ones I like. Cheese, on the other hand, is the main thing preventing me from being able to go vegan. I gave up dairy for about 6 months when my daughter was a baby, and cheese was what I missed the most.

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  8. haha completely agree with the vegetarian restaurant quote!

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  9. Oh my stars. That vegetable patch comment -- priceless! (And I'm a vegetarian!)

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  10. Hey now, some of us vegetarians scarf down any fake-meat in sight and love a good meat-free full English breakfast or pepperfauxni pizza!

    I could never go vegan either...

    My brother must have the distinction of being the only vegetarian not to eat ANY vegetables in goodness knows how many years. I love vegetables myself, but as part of a balanced diet.

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  11. And all those meat eaters out there may as well go saddle up a cow!!

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  12. Karen will probably post this later but isn't Adam a vegetarian? Don't get too upset fellow readers! As a vegetarian for 19 years, I think that comment is hilarious. It would be like a steak house or lobster restaurant where you pick your prey only we'd be saying, "I'd like that head of cauliflower, that tomato, and those shallots. How are the lentils over there?"

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  13. Brilliant... truly brilliant :D

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  14. marilyn, nope sorry, i am not a vegetarian. adam

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  15. 4ever =O) laughter12 May 2010 20:56

    Just
    pitch
    a
    tent
    over
    a
    vegetable
    patch.

    - now that was fuuuunnny, in it's simplicity.
    - better veg on that thought. or not ;)
    - that waaas a hoot, at it's root, but nuttin' to toot about &:o)

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  16. I definitely said "holy s#$%" when I heard the second one. He's really got some funny/mean stuff to say. And I'm glad to hear audio on most of it now! Thanks Adam, you carnivore you!

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  17. Lemons and razor blades? Ouch!

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  18. 2manywhiskers13 May 2010 01:30

    Another veggie here... chuckling madly over that first one!

    And LOL at this, NewMexicanAnnie: "Planted on the second Thursday of May with a light rain falling or not?" Yes indeed, some veggies/vegans can be a *mite* particular.

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  19. Well, that does seem like a cheaper alternative to vegetarian restaurants
    I have to be amazed that someone can come up with this sort of thing in their sleep. It's incredible.

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  20. I could've sworn I posted on this already...hmm...guess not.

    Even funnier with the audio!!! Thanks Miss K!!

    Oh, wait, I mean Mrs. K! (my bad) lol.

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  21. LMAO! My 2nd bad, that was the 13th mixed up with the 12th. OOOOOPS!!

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  22. Someone needs to feed him some really good vegetarian food and see if these comments go away or not. I swear, veggie food is amazing with the right cook!

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