Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20100721

July 21 2010

"Hmmm.... PVC and duct tape... Superhero, or evil mastermind? I can't decide."

Oops, I drifted off and forgot to press "record" so I missed that one.
"Those gophers are back. I like 'em though. They're cheeky and cuddly. But they make a mess. Mmmmm. They need energy for the chase tomorrow."
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(Big wacky yawn. Then sort of singing) "Doo... Doo... Do you want to eat me? Hmm? Gobble me up? Chew on my hindquarters? Do you? WELL COCK OFF YOU SON OF A BITCH, YOU'RE NOT TASTING MY MEAT! Fucking eat something else. I'm as tough as leather. Grrr. (sigh)"
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At this point, I turned over, ONE SINGLE TIME.
"WILL YOU GET COMFORTABLE!? Christ almighty. Uch... Right, that's better. Now we can begin!"
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"I'm GRRRRREAT! In your face, tiger!"
 or click here

30 comments:

  1. Wrong date, Karen :).

    Having said that, I spent the last few minutes trying to suppress my laughter. That first one is so chippy and upbeat.

    And that second one? It's like the opposite of that beastie from The Restaurant at the End of the Universe (and that old newspaper comic strip), that wants to get eaten. And that yawn...

    Gods and bunnies, I could go on forever... but I will settle for inviting everyone to The Great Gopher Chase!

    Karen: I propose that henceforth, July 21st be named "Great Gopher Chase Day." Events and competitions shall be held! Gophers, guinea pigs, lemmings and capibaras get free tickets. (must be 12 or older to attend)

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  2. "I'm GRRRRREAT! In your face, tiger!" Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

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  3. You think Adam was having a dream sequence involving a Frosties commercial? 'cause I can definitely see him (in his own mind): right after Tony does the "they're GRRRREEAT!" bit, Adam shoves in with his own line...

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  4. I'm intrigued by the yawn while sleeping. Until now I thought that would have been impossible. Thank you for always bringing me to Laugh Out Loud, daily and literally.

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  5. "WELL COCK OFF -"

    At that point I laughed so hard I woke up the cat.
    Great sammples.
    The "I'm grrrreat" thing should be a t shirt.

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  6. Lol, thank goodness you put a graphic warning at the beginning! Lol, he can get downright nasty!

    Thanks guys

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  7. in the first one it sounds like he is saying cute not cheeky

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  8. Haha, time to contact Kellog's with an interesting new concept for a advertising campaign? ;-)

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  9. This is one of the best in ages! I want an "I'm Grrrreat" T-shirt! :)

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  10. The question remains: are the gophers being chased, or doing the chasing??

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  11. I felt a little John Wayne coming out when he said "I'm as tough as leather."

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  12. "They need energy for the chase tomorrow". Ohh what's happening tomorrow?

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  13. Ahh yes! The gophers have left the field to attack in their millions the despicable Nazi-like hoity-toity, Elitist, Fascist, that even now deny the Iguanas tea!

    Let their yards have bare spots, and their lily bulbs vanish in the darkness! Let cavernous holes open beneath their lawn mowers, and their pasty white bums be bruised in the fall!

    Let all these things be done and more! UNTIL THE IGUANAS GET THEIR TEA!!!

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  14. i think i love stoney13... ;)
    people like him/her make the comments as much fun as the entries.

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  15. Marisa, Thanks! It is a he, and a happily married one at that! In fact the avatar is a photo my youngest took of me when I was coming back into our cabin after dealing with idiots who follow packs of noisy hound dogs, pursuing raccoons, at three o clock in the morning!

    That's the reason for my sunny continence and bayonet equipped carbine rifle in the photo! The combination of which makes the idiots, and noisy hound dogs go elsewhere!

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  16. Darla - Canada21 July 2010 19:02

    Karen, I don't know how you don't laugh at the things that come out of Adam's mouth! I would have to wear adult diapers to bed in fear that I would wet myself over the wonderfully funny things his subconscious produces! Awesomeness!!!!

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  17. OMG, Adam totally sounds American-West in the second one! Hahaha. Btw, I've been reading for a while but this blog seriously brightens my day, hilarious, so thanks! :D

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  18. Are you sitting comfortably. Then I'll begin...

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  19. Oh my word, so funny!! LOVE the concept of this blog. Hysterical!!

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  20. STM should be awarded a Tony for that last comment...... 7@=Q

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  21. Inception of a Sleep Talkin' Man can be one hilarious movie.

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  22. Funny stuff right there ya got that's for sho!!

    OMG! Some of the comments are too funny!!!

    I hope if you "they're grrrrrrrrrrreat" a t-shirt; that Kellog's doesn't give u grief.

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  23. @stoney... LOL thanks for letting me know.
    no worries. if it sets your mind at ease, i've been happily married for 24 years. i love everyone who makes me laugh... just not in THAT way.

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  24. I would like to see this on a t-shirt:
    PVC and duct tape...Superhero, or evil mastermind?

    It's the very question I ask myself every single day...

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  25. Ditto to Alana G.

    PVC and duct tape...Superhero, or evil mastermind?

    I know of a couple of folks that I could give that one too... They think they can fix things...

    LOL!!!

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  26. That second one sounds immensely like Rowan Atkins in voice and Blackadder in insult.

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  27. I thought you had a voice activated recorder.. ?

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  28. Hi! I would just like to say how much I LOVE your blog! It cheers me up on even my worst days!
    Thank you so much!


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