Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20110321

Mar 21 2011

"Listen, it's not as if I put ear wax on my penis and shouted 'snake warts!' Okay?"

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Note in advance: "budgie" = parakeet
"Yes, you will sing like a bird in a gilded cage. Sing, you fucking mother-fucking cunt-bag budgie. Sing! Bastard."
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And the reveal:


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Yes, we know—having since done some googling— that Adam's version of the quote is a bit of a mash-up.
ADAM: Hang on, "Sing like a bird in a gilded cage." That's from King Lear. It was King Lear to his daughter, "We shall sing like birds in a gilded cage," when he was reunited to her.
KAREN: Sleep Talkin' Man is so educated and well read.
ADAM: Well I studied King Lear. Fuck off. I'm educated, he's just a hanger on. That's all. He's living off me. He's using my intelligence.
KAREN: Are you sure you want to put forward the idea that he's living off you?
ADAM: I need to think about that.
KAREN: No, actually, you're both living off each other. It's a symbiotic relationship.
ADAM: Don't throw big words at me this time of the morning.
KAREN: You're the one who mentioned King Lear!
ADAM: What's King Lear, that's two short words! Both of them have got four letters in it. Come on!

20 comments:

  1. I've been thinking about getting some budgies. If I do, I think I'll name them Adam and Karen, in honour of you. (I have a child, so I won't be calling them Bastard and Cunt-Bag, that's for sure!)

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  2. Aw, my budgies won't like that. And they don't sing. They chirp when I'm lucky. Other times they just make loud noices. ;)
    And sound like old aeroplanes when they fly!

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  3. You guys are totally and completely nuts....and I love it!! Nothing like starting my day with a sputter and grin, thanks to the *3* of you. Hmmm, maybe it should be the *4* of you...wouldn't want to forget your dog!

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  4. *snake warts* priceless!
    wow STM knows King Lear.... lol

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  5. Tweety bird sings in a gilded cage as well. Maybe STM was quoting Looney Tunes, from Sylvester's point of view.

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  6. "Two short words" is a winning argument, Adam.

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  7. Time for my daily dose of garbled and slurred sleeptalk...as usual, he never disappoints. I'll be scratching my head all day...

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  8. Adam totally won that argument.... Hahahaha Cracking up - as always. Love it!

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  9. I heart your reveals!!! You two are the perfect way to start the morning...

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  10. I wish I had some budgies. <3

    Also, you two are adorable!

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  11. the whole King Lear/symbiotic relationship aside...I am curious as to just what kind of incident would lead to the 'snake-warts' situation ;-)

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  12. A blog that has the words cunt-bag and King Lear in one post....I think I've found true happiness.

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  13. I'm loving the ad for walk in cages that appears on the page today...picturing Lear and daughter walking into a gilded one. Gotta love those marketing folks. Love you guys too!

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  14. You guys always perk up my day. My co-workers all think I'm nuts for laughing out loud so often but I just point them to your site.

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  15. The husband-wife banters are honestly my favorite part of this blog lol I love it. You two are so perfect together.

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  16. I just discovered your blog today, and may I say that I pissed myself! BRAVO! A fan for life!

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  17. I Love your comment Cass! - I guess it would be a little awkward to have your child standing up for show & tell and introducing the budgies as bastard and cunt-bag! lmao! This blog, and the comments are just the best!
    (Canada)

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  18. These early morning discussions are starting to become more entertaining then STM :P

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  19. By the way, here is a slightly confusing, but completely true statement. A budgie is a parakeet but a parakeet is not always a budgie

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