Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20110429

Apr 29 2011

"If you look at me again, I'm gonna bugger your fucking eyeballs and eat them, so you stare at my shit."

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"From now on, papaya shall be known as cunt-fruit. Yes. Nasty cunt-fruit. Mushy and smelly cunt-fruit. You don't like the word, don't make me say it again."
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And a typically peaceful awakening:


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STM: POOPS!
ADAM: (wrenching his back) Ow!
KAREN: What did you say?
ADAM: Ow!
KAREN: I heard the "ow" part.
ADAM: Ow, hurt my back.
KAREN: Oh, Baby. Oh, no.
ADAM: Get me a replacement back— WHAT WAS THAT!
KAREN: That was me, Baby.
ADAM: OW-how!
KAREN: I was trying to touch your head like this—
ADAM: You just put your finger in my eye!
KAREN: I can't see anything, and, let me show you, I was just trying to just pet your forehead, and I—
ADAM: You did— You did— You did that and— Oh, my eye!
KAREN: What did you think it was going to be?
ADAM: Well, it's dark, I was not expecting anything, let alone a finger in the eye as a way of being nice to me.
KAREN: It was not in your eye!
ADAM: Baby, where's your finger? (taking it on a tour) Okay: head, ear, nose, eye.
KAREN: No, it's not in your eye.
ADAM: It is!
KAREN: It was on the top of your eye. Not in your eye.
ADAM: Baby, are we going to argue about the position?
KAREN: Yeah.
ADAM: Because eye is eye: top, middle, bottom, left, or right. Okay?
KAREN: Oh, I'm sorry, I love you.
ADAM: Why do you always say "I love you" after you say you're sorry for hurting me? It's husband battery.
KAREN: No.
ADAM: Mmm. Second degree.
__________

Karen's notes: This post has been pre-scheduled. We're in Bruges!

11 comments:

  1. hey adam, you sure that wasn't STW that poked you in your eye? cause you know how she likes to beat on you!!
    I agree with you on the papaya! it shall forever be known in my house as cunt-fruit!

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  2. Bruges!!! Love that city. Make sure you try out some of the wonderful (strong) belgian beers, especially your husband and then see what he says in his sleep. Make sure to visit the Belfry, the market, the city hall and take a canal tour as well as a city tour either by bus or by horse carriage. I can recommend Karmeliet Tripel, Rochefort, Straffe Hendrik, La trappe, various hoegaardens, Affligen. I prefer the blonde beers before the darker ones but we all know the taste can vary. In the end of the langestraat there is a great hostel called the Bauhaus with nice staff, nice restaurant and a decent selection of beverages. I urge you to check this out. Been staying there three times myself but otherwise it´s a great place to go and just hang out. Here is a link to the hostel http://www.bauhaus.be/

    Kind Regards/ Brugesfanatic

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  3. Bruges is beautiful! Enjoy!

    ......And maybe post some of your wonderful pics after??? :)

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  4. Wasn't a papaya used on the cover of that book She Comes First?

    I think we know what Adam's been reading!

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  5. wow...is adam flying blind....again?

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  6. You are in Bruges eh? While you are there make sure to watch the film "In Bruges", its fantastic! Colin Farrell does a fantastic job for once!

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  7. Oh, so jealous, love it there!! Not much to add to what Anders said, but I loved the Kriek (sp?), a cherry beer. Great if you're not a huge beer lover. And such a romantic place, with the canals and carriages!

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  8. a -f-air-y tale storeeeeeh!30 April 2011 at 04:06

    don't think anyone can stand seeing sh!tty eyeball soup, l@@k away, poopeye backl'action...

    {'n so the thought goes...shall pass...}
    dis-day, must-y-add, wor{l}dly speaking,
    will kate agree?

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  9. maybe there is anu fairy princess

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  10. bahaha. Husband Battery. Second Degree.

    I love your conversations post-stm just as much if not more than STM!

    My cousin just moved to England and your blog was the first thing I told her to investigate upon arriving. She went with unpacking her house first, but checking out the blog came in at a close second!

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  11. Papaya is slang for vagina in Cuban Spanish, so yes, STM is on to something.

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