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Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20110428

Apr 28 2011

"Hey! Hey. You killed my velociraptor, dickhead. That's so unfair. You do realize how hard it is to find one of those round here, don't you?"

 or click here
"You never take my balloons out for a walk. They need some fresh fucking air, take 'em outside this time. And on a long walk. They like the sun. Don't take them to the park. I don't want them on the swings, they're too little for swings. And the round-a-bout will make them sick, just take them on a nice walk. See the duckies. Bye balloons!"
 or click here

I don't know about the velociraptor, but I can definitely explain this one. We've had this balloon sitting around the house from Adam's birthday celebration. It's mortifyingly ugly, but I've kept it simply because I'm astounded by how long it has managed to stay afloat. It's been six weeks, people! It's like the balloon and I are in a competition to see who can last longer.

Before it dies of knife wounds tonight, I'm going to give it a moment of fame. So here it is:

And here's the close-up. See if you can spot my attempt at personalization:

22 comments:

  1. Maybe STM reads The Onion?

    http://www.theonion.com/articles/velociraptor-from-jurassic-park-dies,20191/

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  2. ArabianShark - Not to me, but to his family it is. His mother bought the balloon, but with no thought for the "Ad". I amended it later.

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  3. No! don't kill the balloon! Let it die a natural death!

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  4. And give us updates on its wellbeing until it passes. And then a balloon funeral! This will give STM good material!

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  5. I just had a funeral for Gertrude, one of our pet goldfish, this past weekend. I can only take so much grief!

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  6. are you sure this isn't charlie sheen's balloon?

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  7. It doesn't float anymore, but I have a birthday balloon from almost a year ago that is still mostly inflated. I kind of hope it will still be around for its own first birthday.

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  8. totally off topic comment: is that painting of the tree branches in the background a Lisa Loudermilk? she's an austin, tx artist and i have one of her prints hanging in my office! love her stuff. :)

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  9. My friends got me a Belle balloon like that for my birthday in early February...It's still floating, they marvel at it whenever they come over.

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  10. The foil balloons don't deflate the way the latex do because the latex molecules stretch wide enough to let the helium molecules seep out. The foil doesn't allow the helium to escape nearly as fast which is why it says afloat so long. At least this is the info I know. If I'm incorrect please feel free to correct me.

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  11. I had a mylar balloon that stayed filled and hanging on my wall for years. The thing just wouldn't deflate!

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  12. Well - just tell him it's 'living with some nice people on a farm'....... 7Q

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  13. Ducks? Swings? Reminds me of something, but I can't quiiiite put my finger on it... Oh well. I guess putting a balloon on a swing would be totally irresponsible.

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  14. Hope he winds up mumbling something about the royal wedding (no matter how off color it might get)!

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  15. Seems like swings and ducks go together in STMs mind........

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  16. today you're more likely to find scalar tech flying gulls and other birds...the velociraptor are too easy to spot...they might have to be classified as a weather balloon like the ufos.
    PS ... if you were flying the raptor be glad they killed the scalar weapon and not you!!
    ..oh that's supposed to be classified info isnt it...oh well i'm classified too above majic eyes with the NSA so i guess it's ok if i tell.
    EA's Sofia

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  17. I like the disney princess character balloon.

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  18. That painting in the background is lovely :) Is it an original?

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  19. We had a bouquet of those foil balloons one year, and none of them would die...they started freaking me out when they would float around the house on thier own (the kids had cut the weights off) I finally knifed them when 3 times in one day I found the SAME balloon had floated across the house, upstairs, and into my son's back bedroom. Too freaky for me. haha

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  20. Velociraptor?!

    http://youtu.be/fhI8_8KCHfs

    Whose Line is it Anyway.
    You don't have to look far for the relevant part of the video =P

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  21. Okay ... I also LOVE the pic in the background. Do you know who the artist is? ... And so sad that you hate "Cars," it was actually a really cute movie. ;o)

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