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Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20120420

Apr 20 2012

"It's science. It's meant to confuse stupid people."

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Perhaps we've been watching too much Big Bang Theory?

I've mentioned in the past that, not only does Adam talk in his sleep, he has a bizarre way of waking as well. Adam wakes up fully alert and aware from the first instant. It is very common for him to be in a deep sleep, and to suddenly open his eyes and blurt out a comment which is completely sensible and relevant. Here's an example from a couple of days ago, in which Adam wakes up theorizing that perhaps some medical test results he received recently are related to the fact that he eats apples whole, core and all.


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ADAM: (from out of the dead silence) Apple seeds!
KAREN: (keeps quiet, assuming he's talking in his sleep)
ADAM: Baby?
KAREN: (doubtfully) Yeaahhhh...
ADAM: The cyanide thing.
KAREN: Yeaahhh...
ADAM: I wonder if that's what's... you know, my liver enzymes...
KAREN: Oh! Well, yeah, certainly interesting to pursue. Did you just— It seemed like you went straight from dead asleep to that declaration. Is that true?
ADAM: I had a thought come into my head of apples... What?
KAREN: You're so weird. Um—
ADAM: But in a good way?
KAREN: It's an interesting idea.
ADAM: No, you didn't— Weird in a good way?
KAREN: Yeah.
ADAM: Okay, thanks.
KAREN: It could be also interesting to Google. Just Google, like, apple seeds—
ADAM: There's a lot of wacko people who write some really weird stuff.
KAREN: Yeah. That's why you take it all with a grain of salt, but you—
ADAM: Pinch.
KAREN: I think we say "grain."
ADAM: It's a pinch of salt.
KAREN: We say "grain." Does that mean that every time here I've said the expression "grain of salt," somebody thought I had it wrong?
ADAM: Yes. And as typical English people, we wouldn't correct you.
KAREN: You correct me.
ADAM: I'm married to you. I don't want you to embarrass me.

19 comments:

  1. The first belong on a shirt! :D

    And Adam's last sentence had me laughing, too. Lol.

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  2. I second Lora--I am a scientist, and I want that quotation on a shirt! (Not that I agree with it, of course, but just because it would get some laughs at work!)

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  3. its a pinch of salt btw

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  4. Grain of salt. Always has been, always will be.

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    1. Except in the UK, where it isn't.

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  5. I don't really remember if it's pinch or grain. I know you throw some salt over your left shoulder if you spill some, to ward off bad luck. (Makes more to sweep up though.) Properly it would be a CRYSTAL of salt, not a grain, as it is inorganic. Why they say a "Grain of truth" I don't know, since that is not material at all. But then, as a person who understands science, perhaps I am being too literal.

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  6. Grain of salt, in reference to a single grain of salt. I have never heard the expression pinch of salt however I expect that it is fully within reason that the British version of the phase may vary from the US version.

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  7. I is my understanding that it is "grain of salt" when talking about the credibility, and a pinch of salt when talking about cooking, and the like.

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  8. Check for hemochromatosis or iron overload disease. It's a common cause for elevated liver enzymes.

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  9. definitely a "grain of salt"

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  10. I suspect Adam says "pinch" merely because he enjoys going against the grain.... 7@=Q

    Core and all? Were you brought up by ponies? 7@=Q

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  11. In Canada, you take things with a grain of salt :-)
    I too literally lol'd at Adam's last statement! Too funny!

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  12. In Finnish schools we're taught British English, since it's considered the "right version". And we are taught that it's called "a pinch of salt", so I guess that's the more common expression in Britain.

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  13. pinch in the USA too

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  14. I haven't been by in a while as I made the terrible mistake of introducing my wife to my doctor, where she learned that I had been stricken by a horrible malady known as "furniture disorder", which has caused my chest to fall into my drawers!

    As a result, I have lost 56 pounds since June, and have suffered a healthy diet, filled with lentils and worse! I have also been kicked off the computer for long stretches of time, and chased outside to "exercise".

    What my dear wife doesn't know, is that the method of my exercise is to walk briskly to my neighbors house! There to smoke cannabis, and drink Guinness Extra Stout! ( Ah Guinness! Something the Irish do very, VERY well)!

    Today, she told me that gardening was lovely exercise, To which I replied she should go right ahead and enjoy herself with it! She began by clearing a plot of rocks, and I will give you a guess as to whom those rocks were aimed!

    First law of science: If you cannot dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit!

    Here in The United States, we say "grain of salt". Of course we Yanks forgot how to speak English right after we got here, and have been mucking it up trying ever since!

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  15. Oh yes! A very, VERY Happy Birthday to her Majesty, and I hope she has many more, filled with health and happiness!

    I'm sure she shall, as that Her Majesty is a wise, and just sovereign, and knows politics as the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying all the wrong remedies!

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  16. Hey, just to let you know. Cyanide is in peach stones. Arsenic is in apple seeds. I always remember because there was a guy who thought apple seeds were delicious and so collected them. He ate 10,000 in one go and ended up killing himself from arsenic poisoning!

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  17. (background- I'm an American living in North Yorkshire) The phrase "knock on wood" for Americans is "touch wood" for Brits- and in my immature mind, the British one makes me giggle...
    I didn't know the grain/pinch of salt difference- what a strange same language we speak!

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  18. You guys are adorable. The most you'd get from me immediately from sleep is incoherent mumbling or possibly groaning. You guys have an adorable tete a tete! Made me smile. By the way, in England is it soda or pop or coke? http://popvssoda.com/

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