"I'm sorry. It's not you. It's me. We're just in different places. I'm here, and you're... polluting my fucking life like some oily anal discharge."
or click here
Way to let her down easy, STM.
Added later: Our favorite comment? "While that was quite an awful way to dump someone, my friend still holds the record, in my opinion. She told her boyfriend at the time 'Welcome to Dumpsville, baby. Population: YOU.'"