Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20100430

Apr 30 2010

"Ugh. Today couldn't have got any worse. And then you come skipping into frame. A son of a bitch. Arsehole."

 or click here
"Hmmm. Hmmmhmmm. La-la-la la-la-la. New trousers. Feeling smooth. La-la-la."
 or click here
"Oh, this is a one man job. A very big man with six arms and enough ears for each one of your fucking suggestions."
 or click here
"Drilling... drilling... keep on drilling... drill... Oops! Fuck me."
 or click here
"You tap-dancing hamsters. You rock my world, with your little blurry feet."
 or click here
"Oh, let go of my hand. The pony, he's got my hand! Someone kill the fucking pony, he's got my hand! Oh! Fuck! Oh! OW!"
 or click here
__________

Karen's notes: Wow. What a night. I put four more aside, if you can believe it. This nears Adam's record of eleven in one night.

What you hear at the end of that last one is Adam waking up in great pain, having gotten his hand stuck between the slats of the headboard. He has made me feel extremely guilty for finding his injury amusing.

Here's something mildly interesting: Adam has an important meeting today with a client. And he had an important meeting on Wednesday, having chattered his head off Tuesday night. A pattern, perhaps?

Merch update: Nope, I was wrong, the ringtone shop has NOT sorted out their US delivery issues. I'll be using a new shop starting later today.

Added later: Ok, I have officially given up on that ringtone shop. Here is the link to the new one, with 14 new ringtones!


46 comments:

  1. Yeah, unfortunately the pain bit was the funniest part. But I would personally take comfort in the fact that that my pain wasn't in vain, you know? Better it make people laugh than for it to have been just another one of thousands of unpleasant stimuli in one's lifetime and ultimately go unappreciated.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Good point, Gracen. Adam is serving the greater good and he should not be selfish!

    ReplyDelete
  3. "Oh, this is a one man job. A very big man with six arms and enough ears for each one of your fucking suggestions."

    That's how I feel at work a lot of the time. We have more work than resources, and it seems like there's always some emergency.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Not less that extremely fabulous.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Laugh out loud funny! Love it.

    ReplyDelete
  6. OMG! These were too funny! (Sorry Adam, but I have to agree, the OW was funny! Hope your hand is okay though!)

    I thank you Karen for ALL the audio! Love it!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Two nights in a row of piles of STM. Brilliant!

    The OW bit is just 2 funny! sorry Adam but its true.

    ReplyDelete
  8. "Wow. What a night ... This nears Adam's record of eleven in one night."
    Zing!

    ReplyDelete
  9. when he said OW at the end he had woken up right? cuz his voice sounded awake & different, not mumbly like STM haha but love it none the less

    ReplyDelete
  10. It's painful when your dream ponies actually grab your hand!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Oh goodness, I laughed hard when I heard the Hamster one!!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Now you have to put the 'one man job' on a men's 2XL tee for me to buy my ex - he laughed himself silly over that one.

    LOVE the pony ... and the hamsters!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Love the hamsters and yesterday's shadow comment. I officially request t shirts :D

    ReplyDelete
  14. My two children think I'm sad because I'm cry laughing do hard about the ponies... This blog makes my day! Who needs Prozac when you have Adam!

    ReplyDelete
  15. My boss came into my office to see what was so funny after I listened to Adam's "ow". I made her listen and we both cracked up!!! You two make my day!!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Hamsters should be shirted!

    When do you guys start enlisting a cartoonist?

    ReplyDelete
  17. Oh my god the last one had me snorting and laughing so hard!! He's a riot!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Like so many others have already said, the last one was the funniest XD Sorry about your hand! Hope its doing better!

    ReplyDelete
  19. oh the pony! i love the pony! hilarious!!

    ReplyDelete
  20. i just keep listening to the pony one again and again! it's hilarious!

    ReplyDelete
  21. HAHA! I live in Louisiana so the "Drilling... drilling... keep on drilling... drill... Oops! Fuck me." Is the Best Quote of the day for me! lol!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Aww Adam, if it is any consolation the "Ow" part was a riot!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Omg, that last one. I just about died laughing. Poor baby. Give 'im a kiss on the hand! (The drilling one's pretty funny too.)

    ReplyDelete
  24. My evening started out really lousy, but thanks to a flirty guy it got better, and now, thanks to you, I can't stop smiling :-)

    ReplyDelete
  25. I have to chime in and say that the pony one had tears streaming down my face too! My day is off a bit unless I kick it off with you two. Karen, how in the world do you get any sleep??? I tip my hat to you dear.

    ReplyDelete
  26. I just LOVE the "new trousers" one! Adam sounds so happy. Too bad the pony spoiled it all for him....

    ReplyDelete
  27. I hope Adam is the boss at his shop. If not, what does his boss think of all this--the swearing and anger?

    ReplyDelete
  28. LOL I loved the hamster one. Show him this and see how it affects his night-time ramblings

    http://www.webhamster.com/

    ReplyDelete
  29. The Ow at the very end is what kills me with that one and you can tell by listening that he has woken up which kind of makes it funnier to me. Sorry he hurt himself though.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Well, in all fairness, can you blame the poor pony? Rolled down hills, tinkered with, palmed off for a zebra - and now, thrown over for a hamster........ you'd be bitter, too. 7X=Q

    ReplyDelete
  31. I like this one so much, I was inspired to write a short story :) (Indulgences)

    ReplyDelete
  32. You should find someone with a picture of the oil spill you can use (check flickr's open license photos or somethin if nothing else) and put it on a shirt with that quote lol

    ReplyDelete
  33. 2manywhiskers1 May 2010 at 05:05

    "enough ears"..."blurry feet"... and "Ow!" all made me laugh out loud! And the solution for a biting pony (kill it!) I love the big audio days - it's really fun to hear all the variations in a single night. Hope your hand is thoroughly mended, Adam!

    ReplyDelete
  34. OMG - I love this! My hubby talks in his sleep too. Not such funny stuff, but strange stuff. I totally can understand that this is real!

    ReplyDelete
  35. Yes! go for hamster t-shirt! But I really want to see this hamster with blurry feet; can you ask Adam to draw it?

    ReplyDelete
  36. Tap dancing hamsters, can't get it this image out of my head. I definitely vote for it on a T-shirt

    ReplyDelete
  37. Hamsters on a shirt, please!

    ReplyDelete
  38. "little blurry feet" hahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  39. omg... that pony bit was hilarious! not so much because of the 'ow' or because of the hurt but because he was literally, probably very scared that a pony was eating the living life out of his hand. lmaooo... i laughed for a good bit i really did.. i never really literally lol but i did lol just this once.. i actually rofl'd actually.

    ReplyDelete
  40. its me again.. i just posted and im posting again.. i cannot stop laughing at that pony thing. it gets even funnier the more you hear it he was really frantic and you can tell.. there oughta be private machines sold to individuals for a reasonable affordable price that would visually record one's dreams.. this way, we'd see why in the hell that rabid pony was trying to get a slice of adam and why he's always with animals... and who was he with btw? was he in a stable and shouting to the other horses for help? oh, man.. im gonna give it another listen in a bit. i'll be back.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Love the hamsters and drilling!

    ReplyDelete
  42. I love the 'skipping into frame' part. Isn't that just the way when you're having a rotten day? There IS always some a...hole who wants to come along and make it that much worse.

    Too funny.

    ReplyDelete
  43. I'm starting to think that Adam dreams a lot about hamsters, I think a couple of nights ago he was talking about saddling up his hamster.

    ReplyDelete
  44. The Tap Dancing Hamsters and Ninjas in Stilettos should be T-Shirts!

    ReplyDelete
  45. For some reason I cannot get the phrase "You tap-dancing hamsters. You rock my world, with your little blurry feet." out of my head, even though it's been days now. I can almost see them, in a chorus line like Rockettes.

    ReplyDelete