Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)



Yes, I know, I dropped off the edge of the earth these past couple of weeks. I've been a very inconsiderate and disloyal blogger, and I wholeheartedly apologize. But, I think I have a pretty decent excuse:

Please join me in welcoming to the waking world
Hannah Ruth Lennard

About a week and a half ago, Hannah decided that 37.5 weeks was just about enough time to spend in the oven. On February 21st, after 45 hours of "early" labor and then 30 hours of actual labor, she finally made her way out into the world. She was born at a tiny 5 lbs 6 oz, with a VERY full head of hair, some scrawny little chicken legs, and frighteningly long toes.

Because she was so small, we were kept in the hospital for a few extra days. Except for the fact that there was NO WIFI (gasp!), that was a wonderful experience. I had round the clock care from a team of midwives, and a staff of lactation consultants coming in every three hours to work with me on breast feeding. I can't say enough about how great the UK National Health Service is. And midwives rock.

We've been home now for a week, and things are going pretty well. I'm amazed to learn that caring for a newborn truly is a full-time job. I'm slowly starting to get the hang of how to get anything not Hannah-related accomplished (hence finally managing this blog post).

Adam and I are both utterly besotted by Hannah, who is (objectively speaking) the most astoundingly gorgeous thing ever to have graced the earth.

I can't speak for what Sleep Talkin' Man thinks about her just yet, as he hasn't made a peep since she came along. I think we can attribute this to basic lack of proper sleep. Once we get on track, I hope to hear his opinion on our new addition.

I can share with you the story of STM's most recent appearance:

I was finally admitted into the hospital late Wednesday night, after more than two full days of contractions. By that time, I was in such unimaginable, mind-bending pain that they pumped me full of Pethidine (known in the States as Demerol). I drifted into a pain-free stupor, and Adam got in the bed with me to nap.

As I stirred awake two hours later , I heard him begin to mumble next to me. I sat up to clear my head, at which point he growled, "Seventeen shaved monkeys!" shortly followed by a top-of-his-lungs shout of "COCK FUCK!!"

Until STM decides to rejoin us, I promise to try and get back in the habit of posting things I've still got saved from the nest-egg. In the meanwhile, here are pictures of the utterly adorable Hannah:


  1. Congratulations! She is very sweet, what a lot of hair! I'm glad to hear you had such a good experience in hospital too - the NHS is pretty great however much we might grumble about it at times...

  2. She is SO adorable! I'm glad everything is OK with you guys. I've been reading for awhile but never commented before. Her name is awesome, too!

  3. That is wonderful! She's very beautiful. You must be so proud. A massive congratulations!

  4. Wow, "A full head of hair" you ain't kidding! What an adorable little thing she is and congratulations!

  5. Oh God, she's so beautiful!

    Is it wrong that I'm hoping she'll take after daddy in more ways than just her hair and we'll soon have a Sleep Talking Baby?

  6. Omg, no Wifi??
    Super glad you guys are ok, was really getting worried! Take care of yourself and Hannah.

  7. Lissy from Philly4 March 2013 at 15:07

    MAZEL TOV!!! What a gorgeous little peanut, and what a head full of hair!!! I'm so happy for you both! I can't wait to hear what STM has to say...

  8. Congratulations! She is beautiful, and I add my voice to the others in wishing you all the best. Welcome to the world, Hannah! I hope your life is filled with laughter and joy.

  9. Mazel tov! She is so beautiful!

  10. Heartfelt congratulations! She's adorable! I am looking forward to STM's commentary on the new addition...

  11. Congratulations!! What a cutie! And love all that dark hair she has!

  12. She is beautiful! Congratulations from a long-time reader and chuckler ;)

    Welcome, Hannah Ruth!

  13. Congrats! My first niece was born on the 1st so it's babies everywhere! LOL

  14. Congratulations! My first born is also a Hannah Ruth, and turns 6 this month.. how did that happen?! Don't worry, time and tiredness will resolve soon enough (I always say you have to survive the first 6 weeks, after which you can start thinking about routines etc. Just get through the next few weeks of new-parenthood and sleep deprivation).. We'll still be here when you're back (or STM is!).

    Lydia :)

  15. She is so beautiful - congratulations!!

  16. Mazel Tov!!!
    She is a mini Adam!!!

  17. Wow - didn't realise she was expected so soon - many congratulations!!

  18. She IS absolutely adorable! Well done, you two.

  19. She is gorgeous! I was wondering what was going on, glad everything ended well!


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  21. I have to ask if any of the other patients or the nurses heard him yell what he did! I would have been mortified! LMAO!

  22. Congratulations to you both and your families. As a neonatal nurse i've seen thousands of babies, Hannah Ruth is definitely near the top of my list of the most gorgeous babies i've ever seen. She would make it to the top, however I am totally biased when it comes to my niece and nephew.

  23. Mazeltov! What i remember from when my kids were babies is saying "Wow, look what you can do!" in an astonished voice, about every day.

  24. Obviously your awesomeness just burst out of you! Congratulations!


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  27. She is beautiful!! And look at that hair! Congratulations!

  28. Congratulations!!! I can't wait to hear what STM has to say about her, lol. He's probably already going to start threatening to do bizarre things to any boys that go near her. ;)


  30. OMG! look at that HAIR! Congratulations guys!! She's beautiful.

  31. What a gorgeous girl! So happy for the both of you. Hopefully little Hannah hasn't permanently "cured" our beloved STM.

  32. Congratulations! She is an adorable little girl. Just by how much hair she has now, I wouldn't be surprise if it gets long enough to style into ponytails and pigtails before her 2nd birthday.

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  34. She is so beautiful!!! Congrats to you both! I was really getting worried and checking in everyday to see if you had posted!! Funny how such a little thing as a blog can make the public care about you so much! Unfortunately, STM may be too exhausted to talk for at least a year!! Hugs and kisses to you!!

  35. Much cuter than a shaved monkey, and fortunatly there's not seventeen of her. Congratulations to you both. She certainly has more hair than I've ever seen on a newborn, and a very cute face.

  36. Congratulations! Hannah is gorgeous (though I'm partial to my own monkey, er, niece... and probably the new niece when she comes, too!) and my niece was about the same size when she was born. Everyone thought she was a premee, but she was full term. And yes, man does Hannah have a good bit of hair on her head - wow!!

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  38. Oh wow, mazel tov, you guys! I was worried, because I'd had the feeling she had come early; my inner Eeyore was expecting the worst, but praying for the best. You three are adorable. I ain't the Baby Type at ALL, but that right there? THAT is an adorable baby, destined to be in baby shampoo adverts!

    And once again, you've managed to bring the happy just when I needed it most; I learned earlier today that my neighbour, a lovely old gent who'd just turned 80, passed away. I've been SO down all day, but now with Hannah here at last and your new family beginning, I can't stop smiling. Circle of life, and all that good stuff. I love you guys dearly; brightest of blessing upon you.

    Your Pal,


  39. Welcome Sleep Talkin Baby! You are all such a good looking family. And what a lovely name.

  40. Awww, she is absolutely gorgeous, congratulations to the new family!


  41. Congratulations! The baby is adorable!!! Hope everything is good!

  42. She's adorable! I wonder if she'll take after her father when she gets older? Sleep Talkin' Man and his sidekick, Sleep Talkin' Girl!

  43. Congratulations on your gorgeous daughter! :)

  44. You really know how to cook a baby!

  45. joaniebaloney836 March 2013 at 02:08

    Congrats on Hannah's birth!!!!! She truly is beautiful!

  46. congratulations both of you! she is very beautiful. :)

  47. So THAT'S where Adam's hair went... :-)

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  60. Wow! Congratulations to you both. She looks divine.

  61. Those eyes of hers are going to break hearts! Congratulations, and I look forward to hearing STM talk about shotguns on porches.

  62. Many many congratulations!!!! What a beautiful little girl. Sorry you had such a bad time having her and glad the hospital staff looked after you well. Your life will never be the same again and you will experience more love than you ever thought possible. I know you'll be great parents to her.
    Lots of Love from Your Friends From The North. xxxxx

  63. Congratulations! And don't worry about blog upkeep--you have far more important and pressing events to deal with right now. Enjoy getting to know your darling little girl. Sending my best from across the pond.

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