Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.
Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.
Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)


Apr 4 2010

"Oh the cactus needs a hug! Go on, make it feel needed. Do it, fuck features. Do it now. Caress the spine."

"Of course it's your tomato. You can do what the fuck you want with it. Except have sex with it."

"You can't do that to a jellyfish. I'm calling the authorities. You dirty jelly molester."

 or click here

Karen's notes: Well, we certainly have an answer to the question that has niggled at mind: Does Adam talk when I am not present?

I had a lot of trouble figuring out the second half of that first one. I actually had to email the clip back to Adam for a translation. Apparently, "fuck features" is a rarely-used insult, one that Adam himself hasn't used since he was a teenager.

I notice a theme today of intimate behavior with non-human organic entities. Is this symptomatic of Adam missing me? Ugh.


  1. What? No Easter Bunny comments??? Well, I am just as happy with the jellyfish, and the audio is a hoot!!!!!!

  2. I think I might start using "You dirty jelly molester" as an insult. It's so fabulous!

  3. "Caress the spine." I think I just found a new euphemism.

  4. If I had a dime for every time I've been called a "dirty jelly molester..."

  5. Re: the tomato - has Adam been reading "Overheard in NY"?

    Thanks for a laughs in the morning!

  6. Anon 16:16.. HOW did you find this?? :-D

  7. "You can't DO that to a jellyfish!" and "you dirty jelly molester" are so funny. The audios are priceless! Thanks so much for posting them, Karen. Will you be adding the recent ones to the audio page? It's so fun to listen to one after another.

    Anon 16:16 - I'm curious if Adam reads it too! The match is incredible. We weave all kinds of "current events" into our dreams - reading material too, I would think. When I was a horse-crazy kid we saw a movie called Snowfire, which I LOVED. That night I dreamed a repeat of the entire movie. I was in heaven.

    And that Overheard in NY is a really funny site! Thanks for the link. Just added another source of laughs to my world. :)

  8. Prof. ZzzMAN-ylizer4 April 2010 at 18:28

    (watch out...a rambling attack in progress...)

    from a jiggle-giggle to a juggle-huggle act..a dichotomy dilemma song'n dance...
    "do this, don't do that...( all U need is <3 )" what the * features you want with it...BUT....yes, the butt...but can U...according to the master dreamweaver...yes, no and maybe so.

    Caress is a good need to feel it...make no dirty moves; at-chew (bless me),
    too or with- - -neither...

    to throw a tomato, to grabbin' some jelly and cactus cuisine on this pillow talk day of daze an' holidaying our easterly ways...

    - - - maybe sleepyAdam has developed the art of in a weewee no nonsense way

    - - to do or not to be or not to deedoo or s-not to doodee in a daa daa.dah dance or ha.ha haa chutzpah...he's drivin' us loo.loo with his woo.woo

    ( believe me...i'm trying to analyze in a 'authoritively' prof.' never 'met' such a Yes.No.Maybe.Soo kinda 'patient' in all my days --- since discovery of this sleepmanship - a total rarity...makin' me write like there's no tomorrow...but alas...there is, and it's back to square one...)

    the answer must be, deducted as...
    how cheeky he is...

    Do...somewhat Don't...then Deliver with Dear Decency in Delicacy, that's Desserting Dealiscious--- Done Dilegently, Dodging this Dogpile Domino effect...

    till it's Discovered in a Delicate and Dapper Destructively-not-yet Dilemma of Dire Dysentery...Dielaughingly speaking that is getit-to ohgood...

    and gaahne a spineless way, goin' jellyfishin...oh course, what else...
    along with my cactus flask and cactus-leaving pole cue, and trusty hot diggety gloves...
    to protect me from the venom pokes and pricks out there...

    in this talk of dry season and sunny deameanor, outfitted under desert hot water,
    tobe tied-dddown with cowboy boot on hand, in an encounter, just in case
    and amissing Karen is at the heart of this
    case-for-study "organs and organics" occupational hazzards...

  9. I caught the 'Overheard in NY' quote, too - it's listed as one of the STM's fave blogs, so I'm sure he had some subconscious crossover!

    The jelly molester had me in tears from laughing. Too funny.

    'Caress the spine' reminded me of Jack Black in Tropic Thunder... ewwwwwwwwwww. LMAO!

  10. "You dirty jelly molester." Amazing! I want to here the audio for that!

  11. Jelly fish are pretty scary, the stuff of nightmares rather than dreams.

  12. Could just be that he watched Doctor Who the night before!

  13. Cactus audio would be awesome in my opinion

  14., anonymous @2122. Granted, Prof's postings can sometimes be a little strange, but when they get a little difficult to track with, I just choose not to read them.

    Seriously, the attack was a just little overboard there and completely uncalled for, in my opinion.

  15. To anon 01:22

    I agree with Sabre. Leave our Prof. Z alone. Skip his posts if they annoy you.

  16. I just really love how STM sounds like he ACTUALLY feels REALLY bad for the

  17. LOL!!1 I would love to have the audio of this!! HAHAHAH!!

  18. About the tomoatoe one- Its actually from a song by A perfect circle, if your hubby listens to them. In the song, it says "You fucked the tomatoe, I'm better off without you tearing my will down".

  19. for the spine comment. I used to live in the desert, and sometimes the sharp parts of the cactus are called spines. also on a Saguaro (the most famous and stylized of the cacti) there are lines that run from top to bottom, I can see how that would be called a spine too.

  20. I had no idea STM cared about non-human organisms like that

  21. you know there is just something so priceless about the audio for this post. it's not just the words.. it's the way he says it :D

  22. MIT...say what you really mean guys crack me..psst psst psst psst ...ill keep your secret
    nephilim court

  23. when i see enlightened beings like us come together...the whole kindred experience just makes me want to howl....thats the glory of life is it not even for a spineless little jellyfish
    EA's Sofia